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How To Calm Down Fast  Empty How To Calm Down Fast

30.04.12 23:29
MANAGE YOUR TEMPER

Anger never lets you win


Every time you lose your cool, you lose control and at times the cost could be quite high. So learn to manage your temper.


As
a little kid growing up on a sheep farm near Christchurch, New
Zealand,R>Martin was a bright, hardworking boy, prone to losing his
temper and getting
angry. He would end up saying harsh words to his friends and family without often realising the impact of his angry outbursts.

Intent
on mending his son's ways, Martin's dad decided on a plan. He gave his
son a sack of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper,
he
must hammer a nail into the wooden fence at the back of their
farm. The son agreed. The first day, he hammered 35 nails into the
fence. As the days
passed, the number of nails hammered into the
fence gradually decreased. It was quite a task going all the way to the
back of the farm and hammering a
nail. Young Martin figured it was easier to just control his temper, and not get angry.

And
then, one day, he did not lose his cool at all. A day of no nails!
Delighted, he told his father about it. And the father said that for
every
day that Martin did not lose his temper, he should pull out a
nail from the fence. Martin did as told, and some months later, all the
nails in the fence
had been removed. Martin was pleased. And so was his dad.

The
father led young Martin to the back of the farm and pointing to the
wooden fence he said "You have done well, my son and I am proud of you.
But
notice the holes left
behind by the nails? They will never go away. The fence will never be the same again. It's like that with our anger too. When
we
are angry, we say things that leave a scar. And no amount of
apologizing thereafter can ever remove those scars. Remember that!"

It's
a lesson Martin has remembered all his life. And it's a lesson we would
all do well to take to heart too. Keep your cool. Don't lose your
temper.
And you will see a significant improvement in your
relationships. People will like you more, they will respect you a lot
more - and you will find
that hardly anybody gets angry with you. If
you find yourself losing your cool often, maybe you should set yourself a
punishment equivalent to
hammering nails on the fence. Like Martin,
you too might then find yourself controlling your temper a lot better.
Good to remember that you can never
really win when you get angry. You always lose -your temper, your cool and
a whole lot else besides.

Saying 'Sorry' is like using one of
those erasers on the top of a pencil. It's easy to use, it feels like
you have erased what was written, but the
marks remain on the sheet
of paper forever. And in this era of instant messaging and on-the-go
e-mails, it becomes even more important to watch
your words. If you
are upset and want to shoot off an angry e-mail or message, hold it!
Draft a mail perhaps - but leave it as a draft. Don't hit
the 'send'
button whilst you are angry. Tell yourself that you will take a look at
it the next morning, and only then send it. Chances are, with a
cooler
head the next morning, you will realise the folly of sending out the
angry email. And it does not matter that you are in the right, or that
you
think your anger is justified. If you lose your cool, remember, you lose.
Period.

Next time you are angry and want to say something, take a deep
breath. Pause. And maybe say nothing at all.





"SHORT OR LONG, TEMPER IS BAD"
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